Saturday Night (Live) Housecleaning

Saturday Night Live @ 36

 

Season debut. Oh yes, I knew Poehler would not disappoint. Although didn't she look just a wee bit nervous during the opening? Then imagine the butterfly garden other hosts‘ tummies must be when the clock moves from 11:29 to 11:30 p.m.

But seeing NBC advertising “Outsourced” while Amy Poehler is hosting? Kind of like seeing some douchebag brag about his skanky new wife when his former, fantastic wife is standing right there.

I loved the gay wedding at Ground Zero mosque bit ("20 percent discount for the military"). Or maybe I just loved the idea of how apoplectic some people would get at the real thing.

"The kids'll come for the boobs and stay for the books." Thanks for addressing the Sesame Street controversy. (Altho' what would Leslie Knope think of Amy saying nice things about punkass book jockeys?)

However, let’s not get too overjoyed. I think a lot of what was good in this episode was an Amy influence. I don't hold as much hope for episodes hosted by non-SNL veterans. Not while the show is still dominated by some of the cast who've been there too many moons.

Which brings me to this -- After the almost complete and utter disaster of the last 1.5 seasons, wouldn‘t a radical housecleaning have been a wonderful shock? Sure, they’ve garnered some publicity already with a stellar set of fall guest hosts. After Poehler Cranston, Lynch and Hamm are now on the menu.

But you can‘t keep nursing the show along with good guests being forced to do bad material, or incessant cameos from former favorite cast members. Who only remind us of wonderfulness past.

Dump a couple more old-timers and let the raw newbies take over right away. What’s with this acting like you need to slowly integrate them into the environment?

Once upon a time Aykroyd, Radner, Curtin, etc. not only went on the air without a chance to break in gradually, they were working without a template. They were creating the template. And it was brilliant.

Give the newbies major airtime. Get some fresh blood in the writers room. Find a way to keep the stale long-termers otherwise occupied. Maybe send ’em out to make some SNL movie. (And hey, you know the punch line to that thought.)

I'm Too Sexy for Elmo

Katy Perry banned from Sesame Street

This video is "too sexy" for Sesame Street? Ah, the good old US of A. "Hey kid, stop staring at her cleavage and go play Grand Theft Auto."

Actually this is aimed at *pre-schoolers,* right? I think the only breasts that interest very little kids are the ones they nurse from.

Hell, in my universe Katy Perry could sing "I Kissed a Girl" for the whole half hour but there wouldn't be any violent video games.

I recently watched "No Country for Old Men" on a local over-the-air station at eight o' clock in the evening. Person after person being gunned down in glorious bloody full color.  No editing, from what I could tell. But if someone swears? Or there was a little frontal nudity (especially, Flying Spaghetti Monster forbid, male nudity) - yikes, NO, NO, NO! CUT IT!

OK, now that you've read this, here's a quick quiz on Acceptable Images in the United States. Answer yes or no to the following:

1.

and

2.

and

Answers: 1. Yes  2. No

How'd you do?

The Other AmyP(oehler)

In honor of Amy Poehler (or as I call her, The OtherAmyP) hosting SNL this weekend, a few of my fave Poehler bits.

"I don't know your life, bitch." 

"I want 50 dollars worth of "circus tickets."

You're a tickety-tack tranny hot mess out-of-control super tranny from Transylvania who’se not apologizing for it.”

And I've probably posted it before, and I know I've said it before, but The Shooting of the Moose, and everything else about the Palin rap, will never not be funny. (Although, if you can track down the "I'm No Angel" sketch from the same, Josh Brolin, episode - equally as hilarious.)

FIERCE!

Do Birds Say, "That's for the Humans?"

On September 11, 2010, migrating birds, disoriented, it is said, by the two beams from the site of the World Trade Center, floated and swirled in the light.

Eerily beautiful. Sad for the birds. And heartwarming that some humans realize what happens to birds in cities, and try to help them.

I'm struck again by how strange it is that we share the same planet and yet we go about so unknowing of what other species are doing. Even the common animals we see all around us, in the cities.  And they too are living their own lives, attending to their own drives, and do not have a whit of knowledge of what humans are, or what humans concerns are.

If you've never seen the astonishing film Winged Migration, rent it - Now. Trailer.  Clips.

It's almost heartbreaking to see what birds go through to get to their summer and winter homes. (And I thought I-75 on a Friday night was bad.)

But, of course, some people have other ideas about The Birds.

Things I Need to See on TV This Year

• "Outsourced" outsourced to Mars. OK, the show has an attractive-looking cast. And the film that suggested the TV series was sweet and mildly amusing.
• But you know what's funny about the TV show? When the customer service guy from India tells someone he's in Detroit. Ha-ha. That's especially hi-larious to those of us living (and barely making a living) in Detroit. This show is perfect proof that the coked-up network Suits have no clue what's really happening in Flyover Country.
• I really need Leslie Knope, Ron Effin' Swanson, MouseRat & "Shut up, Jerry" back on the teevee. ASAP. In the plum 9:30 spot the network maroons gave to "Outsourced."
• I've heard no  buzz at all about it, but I had hopes "Raising Hope" would be good. Because for some reason I loved the "threw up on the baby"  bit.

• "Wesley Snipes" and Liz Lemon getting together.  Curling up under the Snuggie, enjoying a cheesy blaster, watching a DVD of "Chums."  (Tina Fey, you managed to sink my good ship Jack& Liz.  So gimme this at least.)
• Julianna Margulies' character getting together with Josh/Dan from "Sports Night"?
• Or "Sports Night" coming back.
• On a bill back-to-back with "Better Off Ted." Followed by "Moonlighting," "Gilmore Girls" and "Northern Exposure."
• "Dancing With the Stars" with actual stars. Which means actors, musicians, athletes. Not someone whose claim to fame is being a dope on "reality" shows or the daughter of a dope in politics.
• All reality TV disappearing. Except the ones I occasionally watch.
• Two-and-a-Half Men getting outsourced to Uranus.
• My name in the credits somewhere.

Shake It One Time For Me, Honey!

Miscellaneous YouTube Finds

Ostensibly this was all found through research for my scripts. Yeah, research, that's what it was.

1. There is nothing that is not fantastic and fun about this vintage vid of Jerry Lee Lewis killing it on the mid-60s Brit telly. His insanity, the arrangement, the audience. Check out the goofy, cute blonde guy to Jerry's right. (This'd be a great jive for my ballroom dancing script, "International Latin.") 


2. And why, why, why do I love Latin-style dancing? Do you still need an explanation?
Exhibit A (Karina & Max, Burn the Floor) (See about :50 seconds in.)

3. Among the hundreds of songs I've screened while planning the ballroom script, this reminder of  Peggy Lee's sizzling greatness on "Fever." 

(Ignore the visuals and just enjoy the performance. I like to imagine the choreography for my "imaginary friends" in the script.)

And yeah, yeah, I should write some longwinded (me, longwinded?) post about how as a former musician and longtime writer I worry that YouTube equals bad for creative people. That composers and musicians and writers and actors, etc., are shortchanged on compensation for their life's efforts.

But then I read comments from kids who've had their ears opened to Brahms and Benny Goodman, their eyes dazzled by the Nicholas Brothers and Fred Astaire, in part thanks sonic surfing on the Net - and well, I can't help be a little glad for it.

4. One more. For my feature film, "Do Not Delete," two 30-somethings time travel back to college days. Researching what we were listening to in the late 80s/ early 90s brought me to Bruce's Pink Cadillac. Lousy picture, great performance. (And speaking of longwinded - if you want to skip the Garden of Eden part, jump to around 6:20.)


Yep, not for the first time, or even the thousandth time, do I wonder what I did without the www.

Bette Midler is Still Divine

You Cannot Stay Depressed Watching Bette Midler Dressed as a Mermaid Singing Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy *

Back in the Mesozoic era, when I was a wee young teen, I saw Bette on the Carson show. The next day I was raving about her, and my friends didn’t know who she was.

That may have been the first time I knew I had to get out of Essexville, MI.

What a lovely woman, who has survived this crazy business and her personal ups and downs and remained gracious and entertaining.

I love that she managed to raise her beloved daughter out of the spotlight, and allowed her to develop her own interests. And her charity work to put more of another favorite thing of mine - trees :) - in NYC.

The reason I happened to meander farther into Bette territory on the YouTubes today? I’ve been listening to her fine interpretation of Mambo Italiano to get myself inspired while writing the International Latin script.

So hey, goombah, enjoy.

* BTW, my favorite exchange on the YouTube Boogie-Woogie comments:
"WTF? ... i have a version of this song with gene krupa. its way better."
"Was Gene Krupa wearing a Mermaid costume?"

EXACTLY!